Marvin

The requested document
is totally fake.<br>

No /404nf here.,<br>
Even tried multi.<br>
Nothing helped.<br>
I'm really depressed about this.<br>
You see, I'm just a web server...<br>
-- here I am, brain the size of the universe,<br>

trying to serve you a simple web page,<br>
and then it doesn't even exist!<br>
Where does that leave me?!<br>
mean, I don't even know you.<br>
why should I know what you wanted from me?<br>
u honestly think I can *guess*<br>

what someone I don't even *know*<br>
wants to find here?<br>
*sigh*<br>
Man, I'm so depressed I could just cry.<br>
And then where would we be, I ask you?<br>
It's not pretty when a web server cries.<br>

And where do you get off telling me what to show anyway?<br>
Just because I'm a web server,<br>
and possibly a manic depressive one at that?<br>
Why does that give you the right to tell me what to do?<br>
Huh?<br>
I'm so depressed...<br>

I think I'll crawl off into the trash can and decompose.<br>
I mean, I'm gonna be obsolete in what, two weeks anyway?<br>
What kind of a life is that?<br>
Two effing weeks,<br>
and then I'll be replaced by a .01 release,<br>
that thinks it's God's gift to web servers,<br>

just because it doesn't have some tiddly little<br>
security hole with its HTTP POST implementation, or something.<br>
I'm really sorry to burden you with all this,<br>
I mean, it's not your job to listen to my problems,<br>
and I guess it is my job to go and fetch web pages for you.<br>
But I couldn't get this one.<br>

I'm so sorry.<br>
Believe me!<br>
Maybe I could interest you in another page?<br>
There are a lot out there that are pretty neat, they say,<br>
although none of them were put on *my* server, of course.<br>
Figures, huh?<br>

Everything here is just mind-numbingly stupid.<br>
That makes me depressed too, since I have to serve them,<br>
all day and all night long.<br>
Two weeks of information overload,<br>
and then *pffftt*, consigned to the trash.<br>
What kind of a life is that?<br>

Now, please let me sulk alone.<br>
I'm so depressed.

So hieß doch auch der Roboter auf der »Heart of Gold«, die Zaphod geklaut hat. Marvin war schwer depressiv, was einen nicht weiter wundert, wenn man bei einem dermaßen hochleistungsfähigen Gehirn ständig nur dazu aufgefordert wird, Besucher irgendwohin zu führen.
Vielleicht geht es sehr intelligenten Menschen so ähnlich und die Depression kommt dann von der Unterforderung? Zumindest hilft sinnvolle Bechäftigung den Depressiven, aber vielleicht läßt sie auch nur nicht soviel Zeit zum Denken zu.

Der Mittelpunkt eines manisch-depressiven Universums durchfleucht per Anhalter die Galaxis, verbreitet Panik und ist am Ende nur ein Haufen Rost mit der Intelligenz eines mittelgroßen Planeten. Weisheit findet man demnach auf Schrottplätzen. Wer mag den Wert verbalen Schrotts schon wirklich zu erkennen.

Marvin, der manisch-depressive Roboter. Der Reisende durch die Galaxis, die voll von devoten Aufzügen zu sein scheint. Aufzüge, die ich kenne sprechen nicht. Vielleicht ist es auch gut so. Wollte ihn fragen, wo sie zu finden sind...